Arrghh, I’ve lost my Mojo..it’s just gone…I’m trying to figure out why and have a shortlist of reasons:
1) Work is a nightmare at the moment. We are struggling to hit targets and I have one team member who is constantly underperforming, which is putting pressure on everyone else. I have had to start disciplinary procedures which I just hate having to do because he has worked with me since I opened the office and I know he’s having a rough time outside of work. I have tried being supportive and open with him, but he has taken advantage of my soft nature and his behaviour (such as not turning up for work or calling in for 2 days) has now left me no choice but to take action. As a result I have been working stupidly long days to try to catch up, and despite the fact that over the last 4 months my normal stress relief has been running, the combination of long hours, tiredness and the appearance of my *fave* creme eggs in the shops seems to have caused me to revert to my old stress relief of chocolate eating and curling up in a corner or in bed reading. The reading is OK but the chocolate eating is not so good.
2) Running club is normally Mondays and Thursday, I missed both sessions last week because of work, and Monday it wasn’t on. I didn’t realise how much I had come to rely on it for getting me out twice a week, as with that I only have to motivate myself another 2 times, sometimes only 1 if I can find someone to run with on Saturday! I MUST make sure I go tomorrow, although work may get in the way again…
3) I’m not good at running in the heat . I went out on Friday morning at 9.45 and did 4.3 m – it took me 57 mins which is just CRAP. How am I going to get that to a 70 minute 6m (10k)?
4) I have told you before that I have PCOS. Well I have a severe case of it – diagnosed at 16 when it normally doesn’t start affecting women who have it until they gain weight from having a baby. Because mine started affecting me so early, I started gaining weight and the symptoms of PCOS are worsened by weight gain…and one of the symptoms IS weight gain so it’s a terribly vicious cycle. When I was diagnosed they didn’t know as much about it, but there has been lots of research in the last 20 years into how to manage it and improve the symptoms. Very long story short, I have been prescribed Metformin, which although it is a diabetes drug has been shown to improve the symptoms in women with PCOS. I have also been prescribed Orlistat, which is a stronger version of the weight loss drug Alli. The reason for this is that my BMI is 34 and I need to lose weight. When I explained to the doctor I had been running regularly for 4 months and been generally watching my diet (don’t tell him about the Elderflower Collins!) and I hadn’t lost any weight, he suggested I try it for a month to see if it makes a difference. I am getting some pretty gross side effects right now – both drugs cause a certain looseness shall we say, so right now I DO NOT want to be more than 5 minutes from a loo. God is that TMI? Anyway, I think subconsciously that’s another reason why I don’t want to run. It should take about 2 weeks for my body to get used to the Metformin, however with the Orlistat it is dependent on how much fat you eat…I think the side effects caused by eating it MAKE you eat lower fat! Although I did think porridge was low fat until this morning…
Anyhoo, I feel like this has been FAR too much information, but just writing this post has been cathartic, I am beating myself up about not running when I really just need to forget what’s already passed and move onwards and upwards. I can change from today.
I have 4 weeks 4 days to the BUPA 10k – here is a refresher of my training plan:
|Mon||2 miles easy||Travelling||3 miles easy||3 miles easy||10km race|
|Tues||40 minutes tempo||50 minutes tempo||50 minutes tempo||5km race-pace run|
|Wed||Rest day||Hills||3 miles steady||Rest day|
|Thur||Hill/Speed work||Hill/Speed Work||Rest Day||Rest Day||2 miles easy|
|Fri||30 minutes speed||30 minutes speed||30 minutes speed||30 minutes speed||3 miles easy|
|Sat||Rest day||Rest day||8 miles||6 miles||Rest day|
|Sun||7 miles||8 miles||Rest Day||Travelling||20 mins easy|
So, hill work tomrrow, 30 minutes speed on Friday and 7 miles on Sunday. The 2 weeks from the 9th I will be on holiday in Crete, so I will HAVE to get used to running in the heat. I figure it’s good practice because
if when I maintain my training in 30 degree heat, 25 should be a breeze!
And just in case any robbers are reading this and thinking great! her house is going to be empty, it isn’t because we have a family member house-sitting (our cats are neurotic and need constant attention) and he is unemployed so will be home ALL DAY!